Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
