he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
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