Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Randomize
