12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
