Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize
