oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Michael Bay diarrhea
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
