So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize
