But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Redeem this text for a blowjob
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
