She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Randomize
