she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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