My nipple is on Facebook.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Randomize
