she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
