super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
