Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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