Whod you bang
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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