I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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