Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
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