what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
