He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
