I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize
