I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
