drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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