if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
