We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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