Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Randomize
