We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
