i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
