my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
love makes seman taste better
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
