I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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