We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Randomize
