Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
