Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
