sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize