This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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