I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
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