the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
No subtext here. People are naked.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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