That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
