oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
i drank out of a bidet.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
