ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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