I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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