need another drink. this is the easiest way
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
