Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize