This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
