Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
