Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
You can't just leave with hair like that
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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