It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
