she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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