Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
