she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
