the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
