New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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